Last Year's Crop
“It’s but little good you’ll do a-watering the last year’s crop.” While I’m not totally sure what George Eliot meant by this, my interpretation deems it an appropriate quote in light of my current situation. Lately I have spent countless hours gleaning and analyzing decisions of my past and I’ve come to realize two things. The first is that I spend way too much time contemplating what cannot be changed and in the process of my excessive analysis, I am missing the current joys that life has to offer. Secondly, if I spend my entire life looking backwards while simultaneously attempting to move forward, it is very likely to lead to a psychological breakdown…or at least a head-on collision. So, in an effort to preserve myself from needless tasks, I am redirecting my focus. I have wiped the tears from my eyes and am moving away from my self-indulgent state of defeat. I have to think of this time in my life, and the sacrifices that will be made over the next year or two, as foundations upon which my dreams will be built. I can’t think about the ‘if only’ anymore.